Let it go

I run into this a lot. I don't mean people holding onto the past not letting it go but people expecting we should let everything go. If all grievances were created equal and they were of equal triviality, I might agree. Our grievances aren't all equal, though, and not all trivial. It's one thing if we're mad about somebody being rude to us three years ago because they were having a bad day, but another thing entirely if they ran our daughter over or stole $20,000 from us.

Personally, I'm very forgiving, though I never forget no matter how much time passes. While I'm very forgiving, if we're talking about a serious grievance, forgiveness requires more than just the passage of time. The person needs to be genuinely sorry for what they've done, and depending on what they did they may need to make it right.